The holiday season is often painted as a time of joy, family dinners, laughter, and togetherness. But for many LGBTQ+ people, this time of year can feel heavy, isolating, or even painful. If you’re reading this and feeling disconnected, unseen, or alone — we want you to know something clearly and without conditions:
You are not broken. You are not failing the holidays. And you are not alone.
Feeling lonely during the holidays doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful or doing something wrong. It simply means you’re human — navigating a world that doesn’t always make space for you to be your full self.
Whether you’re not out, estranged from family, spending the holidays away from home, or just struggling emotionally, your experience is valid. And you deserve care, comfort, and compassion — especially right now.
Why the Holidays Can Be Hard for LGBTQ+ Folks
For many LGBTQ+ people, the holidays come with layers of complexity that aren’t always visible from the outside.
Family gatherings can mean hiding parts of yourself to keep the peace. Conversations can bring up questions you’re not ready to answer, or comments that remind you that acceptance still has limits. For those who are out, holidays can highlight who shows up — and who doesn’t.
Some people spend this season grieving relationships that no longer exist. Others are navigating distance for their own safety and mental health. And for many, financial stress, mental health challenges, or global events only add to the weight.
There’s also pressure — the expectation that you should feel happy, grateful, and festive. When your reality doesn’t match that picture, the loneliness can feel even louder.
None of this means you’re doing the holidays wrong. It means the holidays can be complicated — especially when your identity, safety, or sense of belonging has been questioned before.
How to Get Through the Season — Gently
If the holidays feel overwhelming, the goal doesn’t have to be joy. Sometimes, the goal is simply getting through — with honesty, softness, and self-compassion.
- Redefine what the holidays mean to you: You don’t have to follow traditions that hurt you. You’re allowed to create new ones — or skip them entirely.
- Lean into chosen family: Connection doesn’t have to look like a holiday table. Friends, online communities, and safe spaces count.
- Find LGBTQ+ community online: Digital spaces can offer understanding and belonging when in-person connection feels hard. Explore visibility tools like Pride Flags that help people feel seen — even from home.
- Set boundaries without guilt: You’re allowed to say no, leave early, or protect your peace.
- Ground yourself when emotions feel heavy: Small acts of care — breathing, journaling, movement — can help regulate tough moments.
Most importantly, remember this season is temporary. What you’re feeling is real — but it is not permanent.
Support Is Available — You Don’t Have to Carry This Alone
If the loneliness feels overwhelming, or if you’re struggling with thoughts of self-harm, please know that support is available. Reaching out is not a weakness — it’s an act of survival.
- The Trevor Project (U.S.): Call 1-866-488-7386 or text START to 678678
- 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (U.S.): Call or text 988 (24/7)
- ILGA World: Find international LGBTQ+ organizations and resources ilga.org
- Befrienders Worldwide: Crisis helplines by country befrienders.org
You deserve help. You deserve care. And you deserve to stay.
The holidays do not define your worth. Family doesn’t only mean blood. And being alone right now doesn’t mean you always will be.
We see you. We’re holding space for you. And you matter — this season and always. 💛
